This is a video slide show of my trip to Guatemala last week with some wonderful folks from Houston's First Baptist Church. It was called a "rookie trip" because several members of our group were first timers. You wouldn't know it, though, by the way they all jumped in and ministered to those kids! We probably played with around 700 children over the course of the week (500 in just two days!).

God used this week to show me that even if you don't have enough crafts to go around and you run out of balloons, you can give them Jesus, and that's way more important!

The first part has a lot of children because we took their pictures and printed them right there on a little photo printer I'd brought. They made frames that said "Cristo ama a ______" which means "Christ loves insert name here." Most of these children had never owned a picture of themselves, so that was a real treat. The moms also wanted to do the crafts with their children and some of them even came to get their pictures made. That was a reminder to me that these women have very little amusement in their lives and even just coloring a picture of Zaccheus can be fun for them!

Praying for my students...

Yesterday, I was driving home from work, exhausted as usual, and thinking about how to motivate my students to hang in there until Spring Break.

I was specifically thinking about one particularly unmotivated student whose name will be kept a secret since kids can access my blog. As I mused about this particular kid, I felt the Lord saying, "Karla, have you prayed for this kid or only fretted over the lack of motivation you see?" That wasn't the first time I've gotten that question and I was reminded again that worrying does no good. Prayer is the only source of power in this and every situation. So, I began praying for the student and others who I've been burdened for. Now, if I will just keep it up, I can't wait to see the results...

Questions...

Funny thing...as a teacher, you hear all kinds of questions. Good questions that give you that warm fuzzy feeling that you're actually making a difference in some kid's life. Bad questions that make you wonder why you're in this profession. Stupid questions that do exist despite the old adage. Yes, there is such a thing as a stupid question. With 13 year olds, you never know what you're going to get...every day is a new adventure.

Well, I got to thinking...I've got all these students from different religions, cultures and backgrounds and the most important thing they can do is keep asking questions. I mean, if they get to where they just accept everything they're taught just because someone older than them said it, then they'll never find the Truth. So, my new goal is to encourage the questions. Yes, even the stupid ones. I want them to keep asking, keep seeking and keep wondering about things. Now, if I can just figure out how to do that...

Wearing Out

Have you ever noticed how nothing stays new? I bought a new car last year and within a few weeks it had a small white scratch on the door from another car's door. I had to buy a new computer because my old one got so slow. We need a new dishwasher, but Granddaddy is balking on that one. Even people get older and start to break down. Everything and everyone wears out.

Why? I submit that the deterioration of stuff and people is due to the fact that we live in a fallen world--a world that was created to be perfect and everlasting, but due to sin, is now subject to decay. But there's hope. This world isn't all there is...we have a perfect and everlasting home waiting for us where nothing will break, nothing will get scratched or wear out...and neither will we.

As Christians, whenever we get a scratch on our new car or something breaks, or whenever we get sick or start to feel old age creep up on us, rather than getting upset and disappointed about the loss of newness, we should let those things remind us that a perfect Heaven awaits.

Sure, we have a responsibility to take care of things--we are to be good stewards of everything God's given us, including our bodies. But, when stuff happens that is beyond your control, try cultivating an eternal perspective and seeing these events (however painful) as opportunities to look forward to the time when all things will be made new and stay that way forever.

“Material possessions, winning scores, and great reputations are meaningless in the eyes of the Lord, because He knows what we really are and that is all that matters.”
-John Wooden

theRoad

As soon as school was out, I headed up to the Hill Country to spend Thanksgiving with my family. First order on the agenda was the Burnet High School playoff game where my brother was coaching. I knew I wouldn't get there to see the whole game, but my goal was to get there by halftime. I'd printed a map of the Burnet school district and found the stadium on it, so I was armed and ready to go.

Traffic wasn't too bad getting out of Sugar Land, so I was plugging along pretty well and had made it to Bastrop when my dad called. He started giving me directions for an alternate route into Burnet. I had planned to take the route I was familiar with, which would take me along the south of Austin by the airport and then on out to where I could catch the road through Marble Falls. The route Dad was proposing sounded confusing with lots of turns and toll roads.

As I neared Austin, I had pretty much decided to stick to my plan of the familiar route when all of a sudden traffic stopped. Up ahead there was a wreck complete with flashy lights and rubber neckers, and combined with the ever-present construction, we were almost at a standstill. Up about 100 yards away, I could see the road that Dad had suggested as my alternate. I decided to go for it, even though I wasn't sure what to expect. It turned out to be a great plan. The toll road was mostly clear and my Houston toll tag worked at all the toll points...I didn't even have to slow down and wait for an arm to raise! It was dark, but the signs were all really well-lit and I was able to call Dad on the cell phone and verify that I was on the right track. Even so, there were a couple of times I second-guessed my instructions and had to call back for help. All in all, the alternate route was a much better choice than the old familiar and I only made two wrong turns before arriving at the game...right at halftime!

It's funny how we take the familiar routes in life because we're scared of the dark and unknown roads, not realizing that they may end up being better choices. When our Heavenly Father calls and gives us an alternate route, we need to be ready to strike out into the darkness and trust His guidance. Sure, sometimes we'll second-guess our intructions, misread a sign or somehow manage to take a detour, but our Father is ready to get us back on track when we do.

Lately I've noticed that my road of life has a lot of speed bumps. I think God has installed those purposely because I tend to get going too fast and I forget to stop and talk to Him about things. God wants us to take this journey of life with Him, enjoy the ride. Sometimes it's not so fun, like when the storms come, or at night, when things are all dark and you can't really see what's surrounding you. But, that's the cool part about it-God is always there with you, ready to redirect you and keep you on the right road.

Proverbs 3:5-6 "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and he will direct your paths."

Isaiah 30:21 "Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, "This is the way; walk in it."

Psalm 25:4 "Show me your ways, O LORD, teach me your paths;"

Quotes from Beth Moore's Esther study tonight:

"We can 'protect' ourselves right out of our calling. We must be willing to move from self-preservation to brave determination."

"Make decisions out of wisdom, not fear."

"Courage is not denying your situation but denying its power over you."

"The most frequent command in the Bible is 'Do not fear'."

La cucaracha, la cucaracha...

Ya no puede caminar;
Porque no tiene,
Porque le falta
Una pata para andar.

The cockroach, the cockroach
He can't walk anymore
Because he doesn't have,
Because he's missing
A foot to walk with.

I was awakened at 3:11am by a weird scratching sound in my room. My first thought was "mouse!", but upon turning on the light, I discovered a cockroach crawling up a box that I had just removed from my closet and was sitting in front of my bookshelf. I ran to the bathroom for the ever handy Bengal Roach Spray (shameless advertisement here-this stuff is the best ever and it has no odor!!).

Roaches are amazing, because even after you spray them and you know, and they know, that they are dying, they manage to travel great distances...like from the box to the printer, to back behind the bookshelf...

Naturally, I couldn't go to sleep until he was dead, so I'm up at 3:56am typing a blog about him and waiting for him to die...he's behind my bookshelf now, so I can't whack him with a shoe. And repeated attempts to flush him out with Bengal are failing, so I wait...

I submit that whoever coined the phrase "Everything's bigger in Texas," had just seen a Houstonian coackroach. I wonder...do they have roaches in Venezuela?

Opposition

I've noticed in my life (and in observing the lives of others) that when you take a step of obedience to God, opposition begins coming from every side. That is what I am experiencing right now. I know that our battle is not against flesh and blood, nor are our weapons of the flesh, but they are spiritual and they are powerful.

I needed to remind myself of that today...perhaps you needed that reminder too...

Moving On...

(this is the e-mail I sent out to my prayer partners, friends and family)

Several folks have asked me how it went last week at the IMB missionary candidate conference in Richmond. Here are the highlights:

• Tuesday night, we were encouraged to examine all the pieces of the puzzle and see if they all fit together. The pieces were:
  Call-can you pinpoint a time when you felt the Lord specifically calling you to the mission field? Has that call been confirmed in any way? I knew the call was in place because I felt the Lord calling me to full-time service back in middle school, then it was confirmed on several occasions throughout college and afterwards. Last March, when I went to Guatemala, was when I felt God saying "it's time." That's when I applied to the IMB.
  Timing-is there anything in your life right now that would prevent you from going into the field or cause you to come back before finishing your commitment? Now is the time I'm financially free, single and ready to go, so that piece was in place.
  Job Match-is the job you selected appropriate for your skills, personality and desires? Are the location and culture things that you could adapt to, so that you could be most effective for God? After speaking to the second consultant, this was the one piece I was concerned about. Friday, I met with the regional director for South America. My concern was that the job was not appropriate for a single female, but he assured me that not only was the job one I was capable of doing, but that they already had a single female in the same town, working with a different group of people in a similar job. He said we could even be roommates if we wanted. :)
  
• Wednesday, we had medical tests, photos, time to study about our country and people group in the library and a session about staying mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually healthy on the field.
  
• Thursday, I had an interview with a second consultant and a couple of group sessions where we shared our testimonies and specific callings on our lives.
  
• Friday afternoon, after sessions about shipping stuff to the field and safety while on the field, I met with my original candidate consultant for a wrap-up session. He told me that the consultants had reviewed my file and they had talked with the South America director and they were unanimous about the decision for me to move forward.
  
• Next Step: reference forms are going out now to all my references and the board will make a final decision on January 28 or 29. According to my consultant, I should be approved by the board without a problem unless something shows up in the medical tests.
  

Thank to all who are praying me through this thing. I am so excited about the upcoming changes and if I weren't teaching this year, I'd be chomping at the bit to get there ASAP! But, God's timing is perfect and I'm glad I have a good 10 months left with all of you here in the U.S. :)

Redirection

Well, it's time to start researching Venezuela. Back in April, when I put in my original application, I would have never dreamed of Venezuela being my destination, but God had other plans. Here's how things went down:

March

• I met a missionary in Guatemala who told me of a need for a missionary to the wealthier class and university students. I thought...cool! That would be fun.
• I came home, found the job posted on the website and applied to the IMB.

April

• Had an interview/information session with my candidate consultant who encouraged me to start looking at jobs to potentially choose from.
• Went back online and the Guatemala job had disappeared! (I later found it had been reserved by someone else.)
• Read through some job descriptions in Venezuela, Mexico, Columbia, Dominican Republic and even Moldova.

May

• Paperwork, paperwork, paperwork. Life story, belief statements, medical history, personality profile, background check...you know, the usual. :)
• Kept looking at the options online and requested further information for jobs in Mexico, Venezuela and Peru.
• Went on a mission trip to Costa Rica, I started thinking...hey, I could see myself here...

July

• Wrote to missionaries in both Guatemala and Costa Rica. Didn't hear back from Guatemala, but Costa Rica said they were thinking of requesting someone for university ministry.
• Picked Peru and Venezuela as 2nd and 3rd choices...switched the order when I found out that my cousins' old roommates were serving in Venezuela.
• Second interview with candidate consultant. We talked about the fact that Costa Rica needed to hurry things up if I was going to make it to the September conference. (You're supposed to have a job reserved before you can be invited and you must be invited 30 days before the conference.)

August

• Got invited to the September conference anyway since I had a first and a second choice picked out.
• Waited and waited to hear from Costa Rica that the job was written and approved.
• Started meeting people from Venezuela randomly: Sunday school teacher and his parents, teacher friend, two students...
• Started wondering if God was trying to give me a sign...

September

• Wrote my candidate consultant to see if he'd heard from Costa Rica. Heard back...Costa Rica is a no go.
• Figured out that God was, indeed, directing me to Venezuela and now had removed my other option.

Guess what? The national sport of Venezuela is Baseball! Anyone who knows me, knows that makes me happy. :)

Ok, so I was studying Daniel with Beth Moore (not literally "with" her, but doing the workbook study that she wrote) and it hit me as I finished up a whole week of study in one sitting that I have a spiritual eating disorder. I can go 2-3 days without reading my Bible and then gorge myself so that I don't retain much, if any, of it...sounds to me like biblical bulimia. I realize that's not a healthy way to grow spiritually strong. So, by way of confession, I'm taking the first step (though I don't think there are 12 in this case). I'm admitting I have a problem...I need more daily discipline and a healthier spiritual diet. Can anyone else out there relate? I have a feeling I'm probably not alone in this one.

Step 2 (not that I really know the steps) is doing something about it, so I'm committing to make some changes to my daily activities and ensure that God gets priority in my day. That means making some sacrifies. For me, it means less computer and tv time (since all I watch is the Astros, I guess they aren't really making that sacrifice too difficult on me with they way they've been playing). It means maybe getting up earlier and making sure I don't dawdle away my morning. All I know for sure is that no pure and sincere sacrifice for God ever goes unrewarded. In fact He's promised to multiply the rewards (see Matthew 19:29).

Do you have a spiritual eating disorder? What is it that is getting the time God deserves each day? What are you going to do about it?

Waiting, but not worrying

This morning's devotional (as well as yesterday's, which I just got around to this morning) was about worry. The Scripture passage was the one where Jesus is telling the crowds not to worry about stuff like what you're going to eat and wear, etc. But I was hit by the fact that though I don't have to worry about those two things, I do worry about other stuff and worry is a sin. Flat out, Jesus said, "don't," but I do.

The writer of the devo book I was reading made a point that when we conjure up scenarios or desired outcomes to our life situations (like, I want that missionary job in Costa Rica) and insist that God make them turn out how we want them to, essentially, we are worrying that God can't handle our business and we need to do the thinking part for Him and just let Him make it happen. I'm not saying that praying for what you want is wrong, we're told to petition God for things, but to do so with thanksgiving, of course. What I mean is that when we worry and fret over life's circumstances, we demonstrate a lack of faith not only in God's power to take care of us, but in His desire to do so-thus doubting His goodness and His love for us.

This shows a misunderstanding of the character of God. We are told over and over in Scripture that God works out everything for our good, that He knows the plans He has for us and that they're good plans, that Jesus came to give us abundant lives, that He wants His joy to be in us and our joy to be full...all those sound like pretty good promises. So, why do we worry? Why do we act like God never promised us any of those things? Why do we only see the negative, feel the lack? I think it's because we hate waiting.

We're so used to instant everything that when God's timing to fulfill a promise isn't up to speed with our timing, we assume those promises of joy and fulfillment and good stuff are for someone else, not us. Not only that, but we forget about all the things He has blessed us with when we are focusing on the one thing He hasn't. How do we know, but that that one thing we think we must have to be happy would not turn out to be the worst thing for us right now? How do we know that the things we think we want are really what would fulfill us? And lest we forget, nothing on this earth is as satisfying as being in right relationship with God Himself. We've been promised so much, but we look at the temporary stuff as the source of happiness rather than realizing that outside of relationship with God, that stuff won't make us happy. Stuff without God is just stuff and rather disappointing stuff at that.

We're told to wait. We're told not to worry. Next time you find yourself worried and impatient, ask for God's help to reverse your thinking and give you the patience to wait in peace. While you're at it, start thinking about the many blessings in your life and try thanking God for them.

Amplified...

Have you ever dreamed about something or looked forward to an event so much that you had it all built up in your mind, then when it actually happened, it just wasn't what you'd expected and it left you disappointed and frustrated? I think it's human nature to put so much stock in a certain job, a new home or car, even marriage, that once we get there, it just isn't all it's cracked up to be and we find ourselves disillusioned. For example, people who go to Hollywood to seek fame and fortune often find out that there's a whole other side to this fame thing that just isn't pretty...being on the cover of a magazine seems like the definition of success, but what if it's because your marriage has blown up and you are the latest Hollywood story, dirty laundry and all?

I must sound like a total cynic right now, but before you label me such, let me clarify where this is going. See, this is just another way God is working in my mind and heart to remind me that nothing else satisfies but Him. What we need to be amplifying in our minds is the joy and satisfaction that can only be found in relationship with our Creator. Instead, what we build up are the world's definitions of success and happiness...only to find that they aren't that great after all. The great thing thing, though, is that once we figure that out, our lives are freed up to experience the real thing...not just life, but the abundant life Christ promised.

Missionary Application Update and Prayer Requests

• In-depth interview scheduled for July 26

Where they probe into my innermost junk and decide if I'm fit to continue the process...pray I find grace and favor with the interviewer because we all know none of us are truly "worthy," but thank God, He uses us anyway.

• Reserve a "job" from the IMB website

There are still no openings in Guatemala or Costa Rica, but there may be something in the works! Pray for that to work out.

• Candidate Conference

We missed the August cutoff date, so it will probably be September...pray for grace with my job to be able to get the days off from school when the time comes.

Catching up with God

I'm waiting out flooding in Central Texas as I am visiting family in Marble Falls and Kingsland. As I type this, I can look out my brother's back door and monitor the level of Lake LBJ which ironically is "down" right now. The reason-floodgates have been opened below us to allow the swelling Colorado River and its chain of lakes here in the Hill Country to continue to empty toward the ocean. They are expecting more rain and more potential flooding, so they have left the gates open to allow for more to come.

I've had a lot of time to read, catch up on my Bible study and study for my bus driver test (more on that in another entry). Isn't it funny how God sometimes forces us to stop? I finally took the time to really get some things straight with God today as I made a new entry in my much-neglected prayer journal. The great thing about journaling my prayers is that I almost always end up making some startling and life-changing discoveries about my attitude, unrealized sins, mistaken ways of thinking, ungratefulness or some other such ugly thing that needs to be dealt with.

As difficult as these times are, they are also so freeing as I finally cast off the old ugly stuff and replace it with God's grace resulting in a whole new outlook and the peace that often alludes. Paul talks about this in his letters to the churches.

• In Romans 12:2, he says not to be conformed to the world's pattern, but to be transformed by the renewing of our minds.
• To the Corinthians, he wrote that they should test themselves to make sure they were in the faith and reminds them that anyone who is in Christ is a new creation (II Cor 13:5 and 5:17).
• The Galatians are admonished with these words from chapter 4, verses 8-9, "Formerly, when you did not know God, you were slaves to those who by nature are not gods. But now that you know God-or rather are known by God-how is it that you are turning back to those weak and miserable principles?"
• To the believers in Ephesus he says, "You were taught with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, wich is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness" (Ephesians 4:22-24).
• The Philippian christians are told to have the same attitude as Christ Himself in humility and obedience (Philippians 2:5-11). They are encouraged to pray instead of being anxious, to think about things that are true, noble, right, pure, lovely and admirable and to rejoice in the Lord, rather than depend on circumstancial happiness (Philippians 4:4-8 and 12).
• Colossians chapters 2 and 3 are all about this putting off the old self and putting on the new. Col 2:3-"So then, just as you received Jesus Christ as Lord, continue to live in Him." Col 2:20-"Since you died with Christ to the basic principles of this world, why as though you still belonged to it, do you submit to it's rules?" Col 3:1-2-"Since then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above...set your minds on things above, not on earthly things."

There's more, but this is already a pretty long post. It just struck me how many times we're encouraged to remember that we're not who we were, so we need to act and think like it!

The Package Has Been Delivered

Yes, that's right. Monday morning I sent all my paperwork via e-mail to the IMB. I don't know if I should have expected a reply email saying yes, we got your stuff, but I have heard nothing back...I'm starting to get nervous.

No openings...

Many of you know that I am applying to be a full-time career missionary through the IMB. I am excited about the possibilities and although slightly overwhelmed by the daunting application process, I am certain of this, if God has called me to be a missionary, a missionary I will be!

Right now, there are no openings for the two places (Guatemala and Costa Rica) that have entered my heart through mission trips with Houston's First Baptist in the past three years. I know God may have another location for me to serve, so I'm praying that He will show me what that is. (Deep down, I'm praying that something will open up in my beloved Central America.)

This blog entry is a prayer request to all of you out there...please pray for me to know exactly where God wants me and to get through the current step of essay/biography writing for the Mission Board.

Costa Rica...Pura Vida!
(If you're limited on time, but would like to see photos of our trip, you might want to scroll on down to the link at the end of this post, but come back and read what God did in Costa Rica when you have more time.)

PURA VIDA is the saying that Ticos (the nickname for Costa Ricans) use as their catch all phrase. It literally means "pure life," but it can be used for all such common phrases as "you're welcome", "hello", "thanks", "cool", "whatever" and various other things. If you really want to sound cool, you say, "Pura vida, mai (pronounced 'my')."

Our trip to Costa Rica, May 26-June 2 was Pura Vida! Twenty of the coolest single adults from Houston's First Baptist Church boarded Continental flight 14something and sailed to San Jose to share the love of Christ. Here are a few things God did on our trip:

1) The bestest thing that happened (at least in my book) is that our bus driver, Jonathan, received Christ on the last day we were there. We had been witnessing to him and praying for him the whole week. Every time we stopped to eat, we invited Jonathan along. We gave him a Bible, so he'd have some good reading material as he waited for us to do our various ministry activities. One of the days, he left the bus door open and watched us as we did VBS with a bunch of kids at a day care center. We were so excited when he made that step of faith and crossed over from death to life on Friday. He told us that this group was unlike any other he'd ever driven around and he would never forget us. I know it's Christ in us that he will always remember, even if he forgets every one of our names.

2) God taught me (and several others in our group) that we couldn't do this ministry thing on our own strength. Even something as simple as leading a few children's songs and telling a story was a total flop when I tried to do it on my own on Sunday. Thank God we got a second chance with that same group of kids on Thursday and it went much better because we were relying on the Lord to work through us. Here is a quote from Chris Tiegreen that I read in my daily devotional book "At His Feet" on Monday morning:

A lot of us have limited vision. We base most of our activities and plans on what we've learned from experience and the interests, talents, and abilities we know we have. We are reluctant to get in over our heads because of the discomfort we feel in such situations. We don't like having demands placed on us that are beyond our resources.

When Jesus calls us to follow Him, He always pushes us beyond our experience and beyond our abilities...Jesus doesn't call us to do the same things we've always done in the same ways we've always done them. He calls us to launch out further and deeper, to places where we cannot depend on our own experience and abilities. He puts us in places where we must depend entirely on Him...

3) God also gave us opportunities to impact the lives of the staff at the hotel. Although some may question us staying in an "Americanized hotel" on a mission trip, we looked at it as an opportunity to minister and witness to a set of people that might be overlooked by other missionaries. We met so many wonderful Costa Ricans just by being a presence at breakfast each morning and coming in tired and filthy, but happy each evening.

4) We saw the beauty of God's creation as we drove up through the mountains to the tropical rainforest. The sights were breathtaking and I doubt any of our pictures could do them justice. As we rode, we sang praises to God and read Psalms about creation and God's power. It was a powerful time and I know that also had an impact on our aforementioned driver. We got an even better view of all this beauty as we soared over the rainforest on zip lines and in cable cars. You'll have to check out pictures in my webshots album.

5) Finally, we felt God's presence as we loved on children, helped Youth With A Mission (YWAM) move to a newly acquired location, ministered to hurting women at First Baptist San Jose and witnessed to young people in a local park. God worked through each of us individually, using our gifts and often stretching us beyond our comfort zones, forcing us to grow. But He also did an incredible thing by turning us into a team, made up of an eclectic mix of folks from computer guys to teachers to former military to accountants, to contractors, with a few medical folks thrown in, just for fun. We barely even knew each other going into the week, but at the end of the time, we not only worked well together as a team, but we really liked each other!!

So, enough babbling about my trip. There's way more than I could possibly tell and this blog is getting long, so click the link below to see my photos. I pray each of you out there in blogworld gets a chance to have an experience like the one we had in Costa Rica. It will change your life...Pura Vida!

http://good-times.webshots.com/album/559338135igglKe?vhost=good-times

Ready to go, but willing to stay...

A year ago last Friday, my Me-Maw passed away. As Christians, you often hear this described as "going home to be with the Lord." But I wonder how many of us really get the concept we're describing when we use that phrase. It's a comforting thought, but is that all it is?

Let's break it down:
"Going home" means we don't belong here and there's somewhere else we do belong. Anyone who's left home for college, military service, a job or an extended trip knows that home is an irreplaceable idea. We get homesick and we long for those we love that make home-home. Do we have that same longing for Heaven? Do we long to be there more than where we are? Do we get homesick for the One who makes Home-Home? If not, why not?

"To be with the Lord" means we will finally be face to face with our Creator, our Father, our Savior. We will have the relationship that Adam and Eve had with Him in the Garden before the forbidden fruit incident. We will be able to actually see Him when we talk to him. Think of it as the difference between reading an e-mail from someone you love and actually sitting down on the couch and talking with them. Being able to look into their eyes and read their expressions is so much better, don't you think? Do we picture being with the Lord this way? Do we love Him so much that we don't want to be away from Him, but instead long to be in His actual presence? Of course, being omnipresent, we are never out of His presence, but when we get to Heaven, we will be able to see Him, touch Him, talk to and hear Him. Does that idea get your heart beating faster? If not, why not?

So, how do we get to the point where instead of being ready to stay, but willing to go we're more ready to go, but willing to stay? Or biblically speaking, how do you get to the point where you can truly say with Paul, "For me to live is Christ and to die is gain. If I am to go on living in the body, this will mean fruitful labor for me. Yet what shall I choose? I do not know! I am torn between the two: I desire to depart and be with Christ, which is better by far; but it is more necessary for you that I remain in the body. Convinced of this, I know that I will remain, and I will continue with all of you for your progress and joy in the faith, so that through my being with you again your joy in Christ Jesus will overflow on account of me. " (Phil 1:21-26)?