Ok, so I was studying Daniel with Beth Moore (not literally "with" her, but doing the workbook study that she wrote) and it hit me as I finished up a whole week of study in one sitting that I have a spiritual eating disorder. I can go 2-3 days without reading my Bible and then gorge myself so that I don't retain much, if any, of it...sounds to me like biblical bulimia. I realize that's not a healthy way to grow spiritually strong. So, by way of confession, I'm taking the first step (though I don't think there are 12 in this case). I'm admitting I have a problem...I need more daily discipline and a healthier spiritual diet. Can anyone else out there relate? I have a feeling I'm probably not alone in this one.
Step 2 (not that I really know the steps) is doing something about it, so I'm committing to make some changes to my daily activities and ensure that God gets priority in my day. That means making some sacrifies. For me, it means less computer and tv time (since all I watch is the Astros, I guess they aren't really making that sacrifice too difficult on me with they way they've been playing). It means maybe getting up earlier and making sure I don't dawdle away my morning. All I know for sure is that no pure and sincere sacrifice for God ever goes unrewarded. In fact He's promised to multiply the rewards (see Matthew 19:29).
Do you have a spiritual eating disorder? What is it that is getting the time God deserves each day? What are you going to do about it?
Saturday, August 25, 2007
Tuesday, August 07, 2007
Waiting, but not worrying
This morning's devotional (as well as yesterday's, which I just got around to this morning) was about worry. The Scripture passage was the one where Jesus is telling the crowds not to worry about stuff like what you're going to eat and wear, etc. But I was hit by the fact that though I don't have to worry about those two things, I do worry about other stuff and worry is a sin. Flat out, Jesus said, "don't," but I do.
The writer of the devo book I was reading made a point that when we conjure up scenarios or desired outcomes to our life situations (like, I want that missionary job in Costa Rica) and insist that God make them turn out how we want them to, essentially, we are worrying that God can't handle our business and we need to do the thinking part for Him and just let Him make it happen. I'm not saying that praying for what you want is wrong, we're told to petition God for things, but to do so with thanksgiving, of course. What I mean is that when we worry and fret over life's circumstances, we demonstrate a lack of faith not only in God's power to take care of us, but in His desire to do so-thus doubting His goodness and His love for us.
This shows a misunderstanding of the character of God. We are told over and over in Scripture that God works out everything for our good, that He knows the plans He has for us and that they're good plans, that Jesus came to give us abundant lives, that He wants His joy to be in us and our joy to be full...all those sound like pretty good promises. So, why do we worry? Why do we act like God never promised us any of those things? Why do we only see the negative, feel the lack? I think it's because we hate waiting.
We're so used to instant everything that when God's timing to fulfill a promise isn't up to speed with our timing, we assume those promises of joy and fulfillment and good stuff are for someone else, not us. Not only that, but we forget about all the things He has blessed us with when we are focusing on the one thing He hasn't. How do we know, but that that one thing we think we must have to be happy would not turn out to be the worst thing for us right now? How do we know that the things we think we want are really what would fulfill us? And lest we forget, nothing on this earth is as satisfying as being in right relationship with God Himself. We've been promised so much, but we look at the temporary stuff as the source of happiness rather than realizing that outside of relationship with God, that stuff won't make us happy. Stuff without God is just stuff and rather disappointing stuff at that.
We're told to wait. We're told not to worry. Next time you find yourself worried and impatient, ask for God's help to reverse your thinking and give you the patience to wait in peace. While you're at it, start thinking about the many blessings in your life and try thanking God for them.
This morning's devotional (as well as yesterday's, which I just got around to this morning) was about worry. The Scripture passage was the one where Jesus is telling the crowds not to worry about stuff like what you're going to eat and wear, etc. But I was hit by the fact that though I don't have to worry about those two things, I do worry about other stuff and worry is a sin. Flat out, Jesus said, "don't," but I do.
The writer of the devo book I was reading made a point that when we conjure up scenarios or desired outcomes to our life situations (like, I want that missionary job in Costa Rica) and insist that God make them turn out how we want them to, essentially, we are worrying that God can't handle our business and we need to do the thinking part for Him and just let Him make it happen. I'm not saying that praying for what you want is wrong, we're told to petition God for things, but to do so with thanksgiving, of course. What I mean is that when we worry and fret over life's circumstances, we demonstrate a lack of faith not only in God's power to take care of us, but in His desire to do so-thus doubting His goodness and His love for us.
This shows a misunderstanding of the character of God. We are told over and over in Scripture that God works out everything for our good, that He knows the plans He has for us and that they're good plans, that Jesus came to give us abundant lives, that He wants His joy to be in us and our joy to be full...all those sound like pretty good promises. So, why do we worry? Why do we act like God never promised us any of those things? Why do we only see the negative, feel the lack? I think it's because we hate waiting.
We're so used to instant everything that when God's timing to fulfill a promise isn't up to speed with our timing, we assume those promises of joy and fulfillment and good stuff are for someone else, not us. Not only that, but we forget about all the things He has blessed us with when we are focusing on the one thing He hasn't. How do we know, but that that one thing we think we must have to be happy would not turn out to be the worst thing for us right now? How do we know that the things we think we want are really what would fulfill us? And lest we forget, nothing on this earth is as satisfying as being in right relationship with God Himself. We've been promised so much, but we look at the temporary stuff as the source of happiness rather than realizing that outside of relationship with God, that stuff won't make us happy. Stuff without God is just stuff and rather disappointing stuff at that.
We're told to wait. We're told not to worry. Next time you find yourself worried and impatient, ask for God's help to reverse your thinking and give you the patience to wait in peace. While you're at it, start thinking about the many blessings in your life and try thanking God for them.
Tuesday, July 24, 2007
Amplified...
Have you ever dreamed about something or looked forward to an event so much that you had it all built up in your mind, then when it actually happened, it just wasn't what you'd expected and it left you disappointed and frustrated? I think it's human nature to put so much stock in a certain job, a new home or car, even marriage, that once we get there, it just isn't all it's cracked up to be and we find ourselves disillusioned. For example, people who go to Hollywood to seek fame and fortune often find out that there's a whole other side to this fame thing that just isn't pretty...being on the cover of a magazine seems like the definition of success, but what if it's because your marriage has blown up and you are the latest Hollywood story, dirty laundry and all?
I must sound like a total cynic right now, but before you label me such, let me clarify where this is going. See, this is just another way God is working in my mind and heart to remind me that nothing else satisfies but Him. What we need to be amplifying in our minds is the joy and satisfaction that can only be found in relationship with our Creator. Instead, what we build up are the world's definitions of success and happiness...only to find that they aren't that great after all. The great thing thing, though, is that once we figure that out, our lives are freed up to experience the real thing...not just life, but the abundant life Christ promised.
Have you ever dreamed about something or looked forward to an event so much that you had it all built up in your mind, then when it actually happened, it just wasn't what you'd expected and it left you disappointed and frustrated? I think it's human nature to put so much stock in a certain job, a new home or car, even marriage, that once we get there, it just isn't all it's cracked up to be and we find ourselves disillusioned. For example, people who go to Hollywood to seek fame and fortune often find out that there's a whole other side to this fame thing that just isn't pretty...being on the cover of a magazine seems like the definition of success, but what if it's because your marriage has blown up and you are the latest Hollywood story, dirty laundry and all?
I must sound like a total cynic right now, but before you label me such, let me clarify where this is going. See, this is just another way God is working in my mind and heart to remind me that nothing else satisfies but Him. What we need to be amplifying in our minds is the joy and satisfaction that can only be found in relationship with our Creator. Instead, what we build up are the world's definitions of success and happiness...only to find that they aren't that great after all. The great thing thing, though, is that once we figure that out, our lives are freed up to experience the real thing...not just life, but the abundant life Christ promised.
Tuesday, July 03, 2007
Missionary Application Update and Prayer Requests
- In-depth interview scheduled for July 26
Where they probe into my innermost junk and decide if I'm fit to continue the process...pray I find grace and favor with the interviewer because we all know none of us are truly "worthy," but thank God, He uses us anyway.
- Reserve a "job" from the IMB website
There are still no openings in Guatemala or Costa Rica, but there may be something in the works! Pray for that to work out.
- Candidate Conference
We missed the August cutoff date, so it will probably be September...pray for grace with my job to be able to get the days off from school when the time comes.
Thursday, June 28, 2007
Catching up with God
I'm waiting out flooding in Central Texas as I am visiting family in Marble Falls and Kingsland. As I type this, I can look out my brother's back door and monitor the level of Lake LBJ which ironically is "down" right now. The reason-floodgates have been opened below us to allow the swelling Colorado River and its chain of lakes here in the Hill Country to continue to empty toward the ocean. They are expecting more rain and more potential flooding, so they have left the gates open to allow for more to come.
I've had a lot of time to read, catch up on my Bible study and study for my bus driver test (more on that in another entry). Isn't it funny how God sometimes forces us to stop? I finally took the time to really get some things straight with God today as I made a new entry in my much-neglected prayer journal. The great thing about journaling my prayers is that I almost always end up making some startling and life-changing discoveries about my attitude, unrealized sins, mistaken ways of thinking, ungratefulness or some other such ugly thing that needs to be dealt with.
As difficult as these times are, they are also so freeing as I finally cast off the old ugly stuff and replace it with God's grace resulting in a whole new outlook and the peace that often alludes. Paul talks about this in his letters to the churches.
I'm waiting out flooding in Central Texas as I am visiting family in Marble Falls and Kingsland. As I type this, I can look out my brother's back door and monitor the level of Lake LBJ which ironically is "down" right now. The reason-floodgates have been opened below us to allow the swelling Colorado River and its chain of lakes here in the Hill Country to continue to empty toward the ocean. They are expecting more rain and more potential flooding, so they have left the gates open to allow for more to come.
I've had a lot of time to read, catch up on my Bible study and study for my bus driver test (more on that in another entry). Isn't it funny how God sometimes forces us to stop? I finally took the time to really get some things straight with God today as I made a new entry in my much-neglected prayer journal. The great thing about journaling my prayers is that I almost always end up making some startling and life-changing discoveries about my attitude, unrealized sins, mistaken ways of thinking, ungratefulness or some other such ugly thing that needs to be dealt with.
As difficult as these times are, they are also so freeing as I finally cast off the old ugly stuff and replace it with God's grace resulting in a whole new outlook and the peace that often alludes. Paul talks about this in his letters to the churches.
- In Romans 12:2, he says not to be conformed to the world's pattern, but to be transformed by the renewing of our minds.
- To the Corinthians, he wrote that they should test themselves to make sure they were in the faith and reminds them that anyone who is in Christ is a new creation (II Cor 13:5 and 5:17).
- The Galatians are admonished with these words from chapter 4, verses 8-9, "Formerly, when you did not know God, you were slaves to those who by nature are not gods. But now that you know God-or rather are known by God-how is it that you are turning back to those weak and miserable principles?"
- To the believers in Ephesus he says, "You were taught with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, wich is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness" (Ephesians 4:22-24).
- The Philippian christians are told to have the same attitude as Christ Himself in humility and obedience (Philippians 2:5-11). They are encouraged to pray instead of being anxious, to think about things that are true, noble, right, pure, lovely and admirable and to rejoice in the Lord, rather than depend on circumstancial happiness (Philippians 4:4-8 and 12).
- Colossians chapters 2 and 3 are all about this putting off the old self and putting on the new. Col 2:3-"So then, just as you received Jesus Christ as Lord, continue to live in Him." Col 2:20-"Since you died with Christ to the basic principles of this world, why as though you still belonged to it, do you submit to it's rules?" Col 3:1-2-"Since then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above...set your minds on things above, not on earthly things."
There's more, but this is already a pretty long post. It just struck me how many times we're encouraged to remember that we're not who we were, so we need to act and think like it!
Wednesday, June 20, 2007
Wednesday, June 13, 2007
No openings...
Many of you know that I am applying to be a full-time career missionary through the IMB. I am excited about the possibilities and although slightly overwhelmed by the daunting application process, I am certain of this, if God has called me to be a missionary, a missionary I will be!
Right now, there are no openings for the two places (Guatemala and Costa Rica) that have entered my heart through mission trips with Houston's First Baptist in the past three years. I know God may have another location for me to serve, so I'm praying that He will show me what that is. (Deep down, I'm praying that something will open up in my beloved Central America.)
This blog entry is a prayer request to all of you out there...please pray for me to know exactly where God wants me and to get through the current step of essay/biography writing for the Mission Board.
Many of you know that I am applying to be a full-time career missionary through the IMB. I am excited about the possibilities and although slightly overwhelmed by the daunting application process, I am certain of this, if God has called me to be a missionary, a missionary I will be!
Right now, there are no openings for the two places (Guatemala and Costa Rica) that have entered my heart through mission trips with Houston's First Baptist in the past three years. I know God may have another location for me to serve, so I'm praying that He will show me what that is. (Deep down, I'm praying that something will open up in my beloved Central America.)
This blog entry is a prayer request to all of you out there...please pray for me to know exactly where God wants me and to get through the current step of essay/biography writing for the Mission Board.
Wednesday, June 06, 2007
Costa Rica...Pura Vida!
(If you're limited on time, but would like to see photos of our trip, you might want to scroll on down to the link at the end of this post, but come back and read what God did in Costa Rica when you have more time.)
PURA VIDA is the saying that Ticos (the nickname for Costa Ricans) use as their catch all phrase. It literally means "pure life," but it can be used for all such common phrases as "you're welcome", "hello", "thanks", "cool", "whatever" and various other things. If you really want to sound cool, you say, "Pura vida, mai (pronounced 'my')."
Our trip to Costa Rica, May 26-June 2 was Pura Vida! Twenty of the coolest single adults from Houston's First Baptist Church boarded Continental flight 14something and sailed to San Jose to share the love of Christ. Here are a few things God did on our trip:
1) The bestest thing that happened (at least in my book) is that our bus driver, Jonathan, received Christ on the last day we were there. We had been witnessing to him and praying for him the whole week. Every time we stopped to eat, we invited Jonathan along. We gave him a Bible, so he'd have some good reading material as he waited for us to do our various ministry activities. One of the days, he left the bus door open and watched us as we did VBS with a bunch of kids at a day care center. We were so excited when he made that step of faith and crossed over from death to life on Friday. He told us that this group was unlike any other he'd ever driven around and he would never forget us. I know it's Christ in us that he will always remember, even if he forgets every one of our names.
2) God taught me (and several others in our group) that we couldn't do this ministry thing on our own strength. Even something as simple as leading a few children's songs and telling a story was a total flop when I tried to do it on my own on Sunday. Thank God we got a second chance with that same group of kids on Thursday and it went much better because we were relying on the Lord to work through us. Here is a quote from Chris Tiegreen that I read in my daily devotional book "At His Feet" on Monday morning:
A lot of us have limited vision. We base most of our activities and plans on what we've learned from experience and the interests, talents, and abilities we know we have. We are reluctant to get in over our heads because of the discomfort we feel in such situations. We don't like having demands placed on us that are beyond our resources.
When Jesus calls us to follow Him, He always pushes us beyond our experience and beyond our abilities...Jesus doesn't call us to do the same things we've always done in the same ways we've always done them. He calls us to launch out further and deeper, to places where we cannot depend on our own experience and abilities. He puts us in places where we must depend entirely on Him...
3) God also gave us opportunities to impact the lives of the staff at the hotel. Although some may question us staying in an "Americanized hotel" on a mission trip, we looked at it as an opportunity to minister and witness to a set of people that might be overlooked by other missionaries. We met so many wonderful Costa Ricans just by being a presence at breakfast each morning and coming in tired and filthy, but happy each evening.
4) We saw the beauty of God's creation as we drove up through the mo
untains to the tropical rainforest. The sights were breathtaking and I doubt any of our pictures could do them justice. As we rode, we sang praises to God and read Psalms about creation and God's power. It was a powerful time and I know that also had an impact on our aforementioned driver. We got an even better view of all this beauty as we soared over the rainforest on zip lines and in cable cars. You'll have to check out pictures in my webshots album.
5) Finally, we felt God's presence as we loved on children, helped Youth With A Mission (YWAM) move to a newly acquired location, ministered to hurting women at First Baptist San Jose and witnessed to young people in a local park. God worked through each of us individually, using our gifts and often stretching us beyond our comfort zones, forcing us to grow. But He also did an incredible thing by turning us into a team, made up of an eclectic mix of folks from computer guys to teachers to former military to accountants, to contractors, with a few medical folks thrown in, just for fun. We barely even knew each other going into the week, but at the end of the time, we not only worked well together as a team, but we really liked each other!!
So, enough babbling about my trip. There's way more than I could possibly tell and this blog is getting long, so click the link below to see my photos. I pray each of you out there in blogworld gets a chance to have an experience like the one we had in Costa Rica. It will change your life...Pura Vida!
http://good-times.webshots.com/album/559338135igglKe?vhost=good-times
(If you're limited on time, but would like to see photos of our trip, you might want to scroll on down to the link at the end of this post, but come back and read what God did in Costa Rica when you have more time.)
PURA VIDA is the saying that Ticos (the nickname for Costa Ricans) use as their catch all phrase. It literally means "pure life," but it can be used for all such common phrases as "you're welcome", "hello", "thanks", "cool", "whatever" and various other things. If you really want to sound cool, you say, "Pura vida, mai (pronounced 'my')."
Our trip to Costa Rica, May 26-June 2 was Pura Vida! Twenty of the coolest single adults from Houston's First Baptist Church boarded Continental flight 14something and sailed to San Jose to share the love of Christ. Here are a few things God did on our trip:
1) The bestest thing that happened (at least in my book) is that our bus driver, Jonathan, received Christ on the last day we were there. We had been witnessing to him and praying for him the whole week. Every time we stopped to eat, we invited Jonathan along. We gave him a Bible, so he'd have some good reading material as he waited for us to do our various ministry activities. One of the days, he left the bus door open and watched us as we did VBS with a bunch of kids at a day care center. We were so excited when he made that step of faith and crossed over from death to life on Friday. He told us that this group was unlike any other he'd ever driven around and he would never forget us. I know it's Christ in us that he will always remember, even if he forgets every one of our names.
2) God taught me (and several others in our group) that we couldn't do this ministry thing on our own strength. Even something as simple as leading a few children's songs and telling a story was a total flop when I tried to do it on my own on Sunday. Thank God we got a second chance with that same group of kids on Thursday and it went much better because we were relying on the Lord to work through us. Here is a quote from Chris Tiegreen that I read in my daily devotional book "At His Feet" on Monday morning:
A lot of us have limited vision. We base most of our activities and plans on what we've learned from experience and the interests, talents, and abilities we know we have. We are reluctant to get in over our heads because of the discomfort we feel in such situations. We don't like having demands placed on us that are beyond our resources.
When Jesus calls us to follow Him, He always pushes us beyond our experience and beyond our abilities...Jesus doesn't call us to do the same things we've always done in the same ways we've always done them. He calls us to launch out further and deeper, to places where we cannot depend on our own experience and abilities. He puts us in places where we must depend entirely on Him...
3) God also gave us opportunities to impact the lives of the staff at the hotel. Although some may question us staying in an "Americanized hotel" on a mission trip, we looked at it as an opportunity to minister and witness to a set of people that might be overlooked by other missionaries. We met so many wonderful Costa Ricans just by being a presence at breakfast each morning and coming in tired and filthy, but happy each evening.
4) We saw the beauty of God's creation as we drove up through the mo
untains to the tropical rainforest. The sights were breathtaking and I doubt any of our pictures could do them justice. As we rode, we sang praises to God and read Psalms about creation and God's power. It was a powerful time and I know that also had an impact on our aforementioned driver. We got an even better view of all this beauty as we soared over the rainforest on zip lines and in cable cars. You'll have to check out pictures in my webshots album.5) Finally, we felt God's presence as we loved on children, helped Youth With A Mission (YWAM) move to a newly acquired location, ministered to hurting women at First Baptist San Jose and witnessed to young people in a local park. God worked through each of us individually, using our gifts and often stretching us beyond our comfort zones, forcing us to grow. But He also did an incredible thing by turning us into a team, made up of an eclectic mix of folks from computer guys to teachers to former military to accountants, to contractors, with a few medical folks thrown in, just for fun. We barely even knew each other going into the week, but at the end of the time, we not only worked well together as a team, but we really liked each other!!
So, enough babbling about my trip. There's way more than I could possibly tell and this blog is getting long, so click the link below to see my photos. I pray each of you out there in blogworld gets a chance to have an experience like the one we had in Costa Rica. It will change your life...Pura Vida!
http://good-times.webshots.com/album/559338135igglKe?vhost=good-times
Tuesday, May 01, 2007
Ready to go, but willing to stay...
A year ago last Friday, my Me-Maw passed away. As Christians, you often hear this described as "going home to be with the Lord." But I wonder how many of us really get the concept we're describing when we use that phrase. It's a comforting thought, but is that all it is?
Let's break it down:
"Going home" means we don't belong here and there's somewhere else we do belong. Anyone who's left home for college, military service, a job or an extended trip knows that home is an irreplaceable idea. We get homesick and we long for those we love that make home-home. Do we have that same longing for Heaven? Do we long to be there more than where we are? Do we get homesick for the One who makes Home-Home? If not, why not?
"To be with the Lord" means we will finally be face to face with our Creator, our Father, our Savior. We will have the relationship that Adam and Eve had with Him in the Garden before the forbidden fruit incident. We will be able to actually see Him when we talk to him. Think of it as the difference between reading an e-mail from someone you love and actually sitting down on the couch and talking with them. Being able to look into their eyes and read their expressions is so much better, don't you think? Do we picture being with the Lord this way? Do we love Him so much that we don't want to be away from Him, but instead long to be in His actual presence? Of course, being omnipresent, we are never out of His presence, but when we get to Heaven, we will be able to see Him, touch Him, talk to and hear Him. Does that idea get your heart beating faster? If not, why not?
So, how do we get to the point where instead of being ready to stay, but willing to go we're more ready to go, but willing to stay? Or biblically speaking, how do you get to the point where you can truly say with Paul, "For me to live is Christ and to die is gain. If I am to go on living in the body, this will mean fruitful labor for me. Yet what shall I choose? I do not know! I am torn between the two: I desire to depart and be with Christ, which is better by far; but it is more necessary for you that I remain in the body. Convinced of this, I know that I will remain, and I will continue with all of you for your progress and joy in the faith, so that through my being with you again your joy in Christ Jesus will overflow on account of me. " (Phil 1:21-26)?
A year ago last Friday, my Me-Maw passed away. As Christians, you often hear this described as "going home to be with the Lord." But I wonder how many of us really get the concept we're describing when we use that phrase. It's a comforting thought, but is that all it is?
Let's break it down:
"Going home" means we don't belong here and there's somewhere else we do belong. Anyone who's left home for college, military service, a job or an extended trip knows that home is an irreplaceable idea. We get homesick and we long for those we love that make home-home. Do we have that same longing for Heaven? Do we long to be there more than where we are? Do we get homesick for the One who makes Home-Home? If not, why not?
"To be with the Lord" means we will finally be face to face with our Creator, our Father, our Savior. We will have the relationship that Adam and Eve had with Him in the Garden before the forbidden fruit incident. We will be able to actually see Him when we talk to him. Think of it as the difference between reading an e-mail from someone you love and actually sitting down on the couch and talking with them. Being able to look into their eyes and read their expressions is so much better, don't you think? Do we picture being with the Lord this way? Do we love Him so much that we don't want to be away from Him, but instead long to be in His actual presence? Of course, being omnipresent, we are never out of His presence, but when we get to Heaven, we will be able to see Him, touch Him, talk to and hear Him. Does that idea get your heart beating faster? If not, why not?
So, how do we get to the point where instead of being ready to stay, but willing to go we're more ready to go, but willing to stay? Or biblically speaking, how do you get to the point where you can truly say with Paul, "For me to live is Christ and to die is gain. If I am to go on living in the body, this will mean fruitful labor for me. Yet what shall I choose? I do not know! I am torn between the two: I desire to depart and be with Christ, which is better by far; but it is more necessary for you that I remain in the body. Convinced of this, I know that I will remain, and I will continue with all of you for your progress and joy in the faith, so that through my being with you again your joy in Christ Jesus will overflow on account of me. " (Phil 1:21-26)?
Monday, April 23, 2007
Quiet Time (Revisited)
Ever since writing that blog entry about quiet times, I've been convicted of my need to make spending time with God more of a priority. I have actually come to "miss God" whenever I don't get some alone time with Him. It's been cool.
Anyway, I also know that when making big decisions like the ones I have coming up about the mission field, not just your daily devotional time will do. These things call for some serious get down on your face and wait until you hear from God time. That's what I headed out for on Saturday. Problem: I like to have these times near the water...something about being near water, especially running or moving water makes me feel closer to God (weird, I know). So, where does a Houston girl go to find a quiet place to sit near the water and pray (on the best weather day of the year so far-sunny and 72-perfect!)? Certainly NOT Hermann Park...that place was a ZOO!! Pun intended.
So, I turned the little blue Saturn South and headed down 288 to my home town of Lake Jackson...LJ, you know! (ok, not really, but it's nostalgic). There's a little pond with a park near my old house which although not nearly as crowded as Hermann, was still not the best place to be "alone" with God. But, I'd come this far, so I was determined not to waste the trip. I took my blanket and my bookbag and found a spot on the water's edge. I wish I could tell you I had some epiphany and that I came away knowing exactly what to do with my life, but I don't think it usually works that way.
What happened that day was goodbye. God took me to my hometown to show me not what He has for me, but what He doesn't. Sitting there in that place that held so many memories from growing up, surrounded by families with children fishing, running, swinging, feeding the ducks, it struck me that this American dream wasn't for me. I knew that I would probably never live in one of those houses on the water with my husband, our 2.5 kids and a golden retriever. My place is somewhere else. So I said goodbye to that way of life and opened my mind and my heart to what God does have for me, realizing that it might not be immediately revealed, but resting in the fact that He's already got it planned out.
And wouldn't you know it? Sunday morning, the sermon was on leaving your comfort zone. More than once Gregg mentioned the mission field and at the invitation, there was no question I was headed to the front. I don't like the front, but I went, stammered out to one of the missions pastors about my calling, got prayed over, spent some time on my knees weeping, got a hug from my Starbucks Tour '07 partner and said goodbye again...this time to my church. So, what's next? An interview with the IMB on May 17, then what? Not sure, but it doesn't matter.
Ever since writing that blog entry about quiet times, I've been convicted of my need to make spending time with God more of a priority. I have actually come to "miss God" whenever I don't get some alone time with Him. It's been cool.
Anyway, I also know that when making big decisions like the ones I have coming up about the mission field, not just your daily devotional time will do. These things call for some serious get down on your face and wait until you hear from God time. That's what I headed out for on Saturday. Problem: I like to have these times near the water...something about being near water, especially running or moving water makes me feel closer to God (weird, I know). So, where does a Houston girl go to find a quiet place to sit near the water and pray (on the best weather day of the year so far-sunny and 72-perfect!)? Certainly NOT Hermann Park...that place was a ZOO!! Pun intended.
So, I turned the little blue Saturn South and headed down 288 to my home town of Lake Jackson...LJ, you know! (ok, not really, but it's nostalgic). There's a little pond with a park near my old house which although not nearly as crowded as Hermann, was still not the best place to be "alone" with God. But, I'd come this far, so I was determined not to waste the trip. I took my blanket and my bookbag and found a spot on the water's edge. I wish I could tell you I had some epiphany and that I came away knowing exactly what to do with my life, but I don't think it usually works that way.
What happened that day was goodbye. God took me to my hometown to show me not what He has for me, but what He doesn't. Sitting there in that place that held so many memories from growing up, surrounded by families with children fishing, running, swinging, feeding the ducks, it struck me that this American dream wasn't for me. I knew that I would probably never live in one of those houses on the water with my husband, our 2.5 kids and a golden retriever. My place is somewhere else. So I said goodbye to that way of life and opened my mind and my heart to what God does have for me, realizing that it might not be immediately revealed, but resting in the fact that He's already got it planned out.
And wouldn't you know it? Sunday morning, the sermon was on leaving your comfort zone. More than once Gregg mentioned the mission field and at the invitation, there was no question I was headed to the front. I don't like the front, but I went, stammered out to one of the missions pastors about my calling, got prayed over, spent some time on my knees weeping, got a hug from my Starbucks Tour '07 partner and said goodbye again...this time to my church. So, what's next? An interview with the IMB on May 17, then what? Not sure, but it doesn't matter.
Friday, April 13, 2007
COSTA RICA!!
Ok, so now that you've read about my trip to Guatemala (see previous post), it's time to start gearing up to pray, give and GO to Costa Rica. I just found out that the deadline to sign up for the Costa Rica trip has been extended, so if you're thinking about going, but haven't taken the leap yet...DO IT NOW!!Click on this link to sign up:
http://secure.signusup.com/registration/wz_event.aspx?ChurchID=1130&EventID=5506
Pray about it, seriously...I'd love to have you join me on mission to Central America...it will rock your world!
If you can't go, but want to be a part of what God is doing in Costa Rica, please consider being a prayer partner for me, and if you feel led, contributing to the cost of my trip. NO pressure! For those who do want to contribute, you may send checks* (payable to HFBC) to:
Houston's First Baptist Church
7401 Katy Freeway
Houston, TX 77024
*In order to receive a tax-deduction for your contribution, please do not put my name in the memo line. Instead, include a note with your gift indicating that it is to go toward Karla Turner's trip to Costa Rica.
Monday, March 26, 2007
Gua-te-la-mal-a '07
As many of you know, I spent my Spring Break in Guatemala on a mission trip. This was my third jaunt to the land of volcanoes and it always amazes me how God does something new in and through me each time. Here are some highlights and lessons from my trip.
1) Victor, Ingrid, Jose and Maenor are students at Escuela Integrada with whom I got to share Christ. We had gone to one of the many ruins in Antigua to eat pizza and play with the students when suddenly, the groundskeeper comes out yelling at the kids telling them if they didn't respect the place they would never be allowed back. Come to find out, someone had written on a wall with a black marker. There was a private school there too and the principal of Escuela Integrada was highly upset that the guy assumed it was her kids because they were from the "poor school." Turns out, it was one of her kids, but that's beside the point. On the way back from the school, Victor was asking why the man was so mad. Somehow James (one of our group members) turned the question to the gospel...this is where I came in. I was able to tag team with James and share the gospel with Victor. When we got back to the school, several kids were really upset because their friend was in trouble for writing on the wall and was claiming she did it because she was possessed by demons. This gave me another opportunity to pray with the whole group of them and to share the Truth with a few who asked if I believed in spirits. That was a powerful time!
2) This Christmas, my cousin's fiance taught me the steps to solving the Rubik's Cube. I was passing on my new-found skill when it hit me that the first step is to make a cross. Then, as you do the second step, you have to continually go back to the cross and make sure you don't lose it. What an illustration! I took that and developed it a little further to make a gospel presentation as I solved the Cube (ask me sometime and I'll show you). Our first day in Guatemala, I was able to use the Cube to witness to a whole table full of teenagers at the mall. We followed it up with tracts and then prayed with them. What a crazy thing! Who knows what God's gonna' use!?!
3) Short term, long-term, career. These are the types of missionaries out there and I have up until now, only been the first, but this week while I was in Guatemala, God confirmed to me (again, because I've felt this call since Junior High) that He wants me to step it up and go long. So, I put in my application with the International Mission Board (IMB)...now to wait and see what God has next. My new friend Paula, who was part of our team, is in the same boat and we even talked about becoming roommates when we both get there...to Antigua, that is.
4) Use what you have. This was the devotional I read from "At His Feet" to our group on our last day. The passage was when Christ fed the 5,000 but the devotional had a different take from what I've heard before. It focused on the role of the disciples who only had 5 loaves and 2 fish that they'd bummed off some kid in the crowd. They offered what they had and Christ used it to feed a multitude. The author of the devotional was telling us that it's ok to pray for God to touch the nations and save the lost, but never to discount our role in that. What Jesus told the disciples when they urged Him to send the folks away to go buy food was "you give them something to eat." I'm sure their thought was, "Are you kidding me?" Obviously, He was not. It doesn't matter how small your offering to the Savior, He will multiply and use whatever you have to give.
Well, Those are some highlights and lessons from Guatemala '07. There is so much more that I could share, but for the sake of those who don't like to read lengthy blogs, I'll refrain. Follow the link below to see photos of our trip. There are a lot there, so I won't feel bad if you skim through them, but make sure you get to the part with Lake Atitlan. What a gorgeous bit of God's creation!
http://good-times.webshots.com/slideshow/558280195XYzMCN
And thanks a million to those who prayed and gave so I could go!
Wednesday, March 21, 2007
It's Not About Me
It really would be nice if I could remember that. There would be no posts like the previous one in which I confess discontent and distorted views of God.
Comfortingly, we can see most of the Bible characters learn this same lesson. Great men of the faith have also been here, done this. However taking comfort from being in good company isn't really where I was going with this.
I just want to assure the blogworld out there that I do know that life's not about me. God's not here to make me happy, but He does intend to glorify Himself through me. If that means through my blessings or through my struggles, to God be the Glory. John Piper says (adapting from his reading of C.S. Lewis) that "God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in Him." Not in the stuff He gives us, but IN HIM. I pray for all of us, you, me and my friends who neither blog nor lurk, that we will discover what that means to be satisfied in God and thus to glorify Him with our lives.
It really would be nice if I could remember that. There would be no posts like the previous one in which I confess discontent and distorted views of God.
Comfortingly, we can see most of the Bible characters learn this same lesson. Great men of the faith have also been here, done this. However taking comfort from being in good company isn't really where I was going with this.
I just want to assure the blogworld out there that I do know that life's not about me. God's not here to make me happy, but He does intend to glorify Himself through me. If that means through my blessings or through my struggles, to God be the Glory. John Piper says (adapting from his reading of C.S. Lewis) that "God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in Him." Not in the stuff He gives us, but IN HIM. I pray for all of us, you, me and my friends who neither blog nor lurk, that we will discover what that means to be satisfied in God and thus to glorify Him with our lives.
Monday, March 19, 2007
What's the Catch?
During another enlightening Starbuck's experience (in which I also discovered that although caramel and chocolate are both yummy, the "Grande Caramel Mocha" is just ok), I was confronted with a not so pretty understanding of how I view God.
I think I've been approaching my Father with an attitude of resentment because I feel like He's been holding out on me and I'm not getting all the good stuff He intends for me to have because there's something I still have to do. In the back of my mind, I come to Him in prayer with the mindset that He doesn't intend to really answer me on the things that I most especially want because somewhere along the way I failed to hit the right button (or perhaps I somehow hit the wrong button) and He's still punishing me for it. I keep thinking that the promises He gives us in Scripture come with a secret catch, some condition I haven't met and for that reason, I'm unworthy of His fulfilling them in my life.
Oh, deep down I know better, but that doesn't transfer over into the way I pray. I still pray assuming God's not going to answer me...not because He can't, but because He simply doesn't want to. Attributing that kind of cruelty and capriciousness to God is dangerous, foolhearty and downright dumb. I know God is GOOD and His desires for me are more than I can ask or imagine. The problem comes with my human impatience. Because God isn't answering in my time frame, I assume He doesn't care and isn't interested in my affairs. Because I've been asking for the same thing for 13 years, I've got it in my head that I've already got my answer and that answer is "no." Because I think God has said "no" to my request, I guess I feel like He's denying me something good. I feel He's chosen against me. And so insues the petulant fit, much like that of a child who asks for candy in the grocery store checkout and is denied her request. Forget that the parent has good reason for denying the request for candy...I want it and I want it NOW! Ok, sorry.
If God is like the parent in the grocery store, the petulant fit doesn't make Him want to hurry and honor my request, but to keep withholding until I grow up a little and am mature enough to handle what He has for me. But, in the meantime, He has already blessed me with so much. When I stop and take stock of my blessings, I find that I'm blessed beyond measure and way beyond what I deserve. I must remind myself often and regularly that I am so blessed that I can't even begin to count the ways.
Does anyone else share this struggle?
During another enlightening Starbuck's experience (in which I also discovered that although caramel and chocolate are both yummy, the "Grande Caramel Mocha" is just ok), I was confronted with a not so pretty understanding of how I view God.
I think I've been approaching my Father with an attitude of resentment because I feel like He's been holding out on me and I'm not getting all the good stuff He intends for me to have because there's something I still have to do. In the back of my mind, I come to Him in prayer with the mindset that He doesn't intend to really answer me on the things that I most especially want because somewhere along the way I failed to hit the right button (or perhaps I somehow hit the wrong button) and He's still punishing me for it. I keep thinking that the promises He gives us in Scripture come with a secret catch, some condition I haven't met and for that reason, I'm unworthy of His fulfilling them in my life.
Oh, deep down I know better, but that doesn't transfer over into the way I pray. I still pray assuming God's not going to answer me...not because He can't, but because He simply doesn't want to. Attributing that kind of cruelty and capriciousness to God is dangerous, foolhearty and downright dumb. I know God is GOOD and His desires for me are more than I can ask or imagine. The problem comes with my human impatience. Because God isn't answering in my time frame, I assume He doesn't care and isn't interested in my affairs. Because I've been asking for the same thing for 13 years, I've got it in my head that I've already got my answer and that answer is "no." Because I think God has said "no" to my request, I guess I feel like He's denying me something good. I feel He's chosen against me. And so insues the petulant fit, much like that of a child who asks for candy in the grocery store checkout and is denied her request. Forget that the parent has good reason for denying the request for candy...I want it and I want it NOW! Ok, sorry.
If God is like the parent in the grocery store, the petulant fit doesn't make Him want to hurry and honor my request, but to keep withholding until I grow up a little and am mature enough to handle what He has for me. But, in the meantime, He has already blessed me with so much. When I stop and take stock of my blessings, I find that I'm blessed beyond measure and way beyond what I deserve. I must remind myself often and regularly that I am so blessed that I can't even begin to count the ways.
Does anyone else share this struggle?
Saturday, March 03, 2007
Covenant
To go on a mission trip with Houston's First Baptist, you have to sign a covenant saying you will pay for the full cost of the trip, you won't abandon the group or do anything inappropriate or disrespectful, you will be accountable to the leader of the group and respect his/her decisions, etc, etc.
And then came #6. "I will be faithful to daily prayer and devotions in preparation for this trip, as well as faithfully attending the Church I represent. If I struggle with these spiritual disciplines, I will seek help immediately."
I think God is trying to push me past my sentiments in the previous blog and show me the need for a more disciplined daily time with Him. I have already sought help with this from the commenter of the previous blog, but now I am beginning to realize that it's a legitimate need in my life.
I've been depending on those growth spurts to keep me going and leaned on previous times of intimacy rather than seeking daily intimacy through devotional bible reading and prayer. I've also depended too much on the previous "knowledge about God and His Word" gleaned from years of theological education, rather than seeking to really KNOW Him and truly cherish His Word. This is going to call for a change in daily time management and habits. If you're out there reading this...pray for me. Thanks!
To go on a mission trip with Houston's First Baptist, you have to sign a covenant saying you will pay for the full cost of the trip, you won't abandon the group or do anything inappropriate or disrespectful, you will be accountable to the leader of the group and respect his/her decisions, etc, etc.
And then came #6. "I will be faithful to daily prayer and devotions in preparation for this trip, as well as faithfully attending the Church I represent. If I struggle with these spiritual disciplines, I will seek help immediately."
I think God is trying to push me past my sentiments in the previous blog and show me the need for a more disciplined daily time with Him. I have already sought help with this from the commenter of the previous blog, but now I am beginning to realize that it's a legitimate need in my life.
I've been depending on those growth spurts to keep me going and leaned on previous times of intimacy rather than seeking daily intimacy through devotional bible reading and prayer. I've also depended too much on the previous "knowledge about God and His Word" gleaned from years of theological education, rather than seeking to really KNOW Him and truly cherish His Word. This is going to call for a change in daily time management and habits. If you're out there reading this...pray for me. Thanks!
Monday, February 26, 2007
Quiet Time
When I was a kid growing up in the First Baptist (Lake Jackson, not Houston) youth group, I remember all those talks the youth ministers and Sunday School teachers used to give us about having a "quiet time." We got special devotional books and cool teen journals, etc, etc. We had guides on what order to do our quiet time in and how long it should take and even what order to say our daily prayers. Every time, I would get this nagging guilty feeling that I was doomed because I didn't have a regular time with God and everyone else seemed to have it all together and be Masters of the Quiet Time. I, not so much. To this day, I struggle with the daily thing(Insert collective gasp here).
But, here's the thing. I wonder where the line is drawn between legalistic checking of the box "Bible read daily" and the real life experience of being in relationship with God. See, the way I see it (and I'm totally ok with being wrong) is that God wants us. He wants to be in relationship with us. That's a two-way street. But it's a personal, love-relationship, not a business one. We don't make conference calls and set up online web chats to do deals with people in Tokyo. I may not check the box daily, but I have a deep and passionate relationship with my Savior. I have learned and grown and changed and been used and found my true joy and peace in Him. I love His Word. I memorize it and cling to it and claim its promises. I talk to Him in the car, in the shower, in my room, by the lake, river, ocean, fountain, in countries near and far. I have seen His hand move in others' lives and been blessed to be used by Him.
Is it possible that the daily quiet time isn't so cut and dried as what those youth ministers and Sunday school teachers described (or rather prescribed)? Isn't it possible to have a comfortable silence with the Savior that doesn't involve either of us speaking? Is it perhaps those growth spurts during key times of our lives that keep us on the right track? Am I on the wrong track? Is someone out there reading this going, "wow, this girl needs help. She's way off on the whole 'spiritual disciplines thing.'" Maybe I am. But I don't think so. I think we beat ourselves up about not being "disciplined" when it's actually not God-given conviction, but self-imposed guilt. We DO need time with God. No relationship can flourish without times of intimacy. But rather than scourging ourselves for our lack of daily discipline, why not make the most of the deep, albeit potentially sporadic, times of fellowship, growth, prayer and Bible study? Why not make a vow to God to be His friend and make Him our confidant? I've found that sometimes the daily discipline of study is dry and unfruitful, while the sporadic times can be so much more fulfilling and nurturing.
Am I rationalizing? If so, somebody out there set me straight. For now, I will go on drinking daily of that which is already in my head and in my heart of God. I will pray and I will study and I will grow, but I will not wallow in guilt about my lack of a daily "quiet time."
When I was a kid growing up in the First Baptist (Lake Jackson, not Houston) youth group, I remember all those talks the youth ministers and Sunday School teachers used to give us about having a "quiet time." We got special devotional books and cool teen journals, etc, etc. We had guides on what order to do our quiet time in and how long it should take and even what order to say our daily prayers. Every time, I would get this nagging guilty feeling that I was doomed because I didn't have a regular time with God and everyone else seemed to have it all together and be Masters of the Quiet Time. I, not so much. To this day, I struggle with the daily thing(Insert collective gasp here).
But, here's the thing. I wonder where the line is drawn between legalistic checking of the box "Bible read daily" and the real life experience of being in relationship with God. See, the way I see it (and I'm totally ok with being wrong) is that God wants us. He wants to be in relationship with us. That's a two-way street. But it's a personal, love-relationship, not a business one. We don't make conference calls and set up online web chats to do deals with people in Tokyo. I may not check the box daily, but I have a deep and passionate relationship with my Savior. I have learned and grown and changed and been used and found my true joy and peace in Him. I love His Word. I memorize it and cling to it and claim its promises. I talk to Him in the car, in the shower, in my room, by the lake, river, ocean, fountain, in countries near and far. I have seen His hand move in others' lives and been blessed to be used by Him.
Is it possible that the daily quiet time isn't so cut and dried as what those youth ministers and Sunday school teachers described (or rather prescribed)? Isn't it possible to have a comfortable silence with the Savior that doesn't involve either of us speaking? Is it perhaps those growth spurts during key times of our lives that keep us on the right track? Am I on the wrong track? Is someone out there reading this going, "wow, this girl needs help. She's way off on the whole 'spiritual disciplines thing.'" Maybe I am. But I don't think so. I think we beat ourselves up about not being "disciplined" when it's actually not God-given conviction, but self-imposed guilt. We DO need time with God. No relationship can flourish without times of intimacy. But rather than scourging ourselves for our lack of daily discipline, why not make the most of the deep, albeit potentially sporadic, times of fellowship, growth, prayer and Bible study? Why not make a vow to God to be His friend and make Him our confidant? I've found that sometimes the daily discipline of study is dry and unfruitful, while the sporadic times can be so much more fulfilling and nurturing.
Am I rationalizing? If so, somebody out there set me straight. For now, I will go on drinking daily of that which is already in my head and in my heart of God. I will pray and I will study and I will grow, but I will not wallow in guilt about my lack of a daily "quiet time."
Monday, February 19, 2007
Dwell
*Disclaimer: this is an extremely disjointed, stream of consciousness blog that may not make a bit of sense to anyone who reads it. Don't expect to follow this train of thought...I think it derailed.
I've been told it's time to blog again. I think there are only two people who still read my blog, but that's ok, this is more a time to get my thoughts out than to really say anything to anyone, so I'm blogging again.
I was driving home from Starbucks just now, mulling over the talk I'd just had with my good friend Arshunda and trying to decide what to blog about. In that talk, I had mentioned a Caedmon's Call song called "You Created." The chorus says, "You created nothing that gives me more pleasure than you. And you won't give me something that gives me more pleasure than you." That's so not how my thinking has gone lately. I've been caught up in seeking something, a relationship, a place to plug in at church, a new adventure, whatever, just something because I haven't really been content with God. I've honestly just plain failed to let Him be my source of joy. It's the same old, same old I've got to wrap my head around. We have a God-shaped vacuum that we're all trying to fill with world-shaped stuff and it doesn't work. It never has. It never will. Only when we realize and really buy into the truth that God designed us with that vacuum and God intends to fill it with Himself, do we find joy.
Arshunda and I also talked about going on the offensive to combat the lies of the enemy and fight for that joy and abundance we're promised in Scripture. It's human nature to hole up and defend yourself...to put up your fences, your fists, and protect, protect, protect. But, going on the offensive involves dying to self. It calls for reckless abandonment of security and exposing yourself to the potential for hurt or even death. Paul says we are to offer our bodies as living sacrifices. Jesus told us to die to ourselves. Those things happen on the battle field. They happen as we shift our perspective from inward, focusing on me and my needs to outward, seeing the needs of others. So many of us are seeking to know God's individual plan for our lives, when God wants us to see His big picture plan for the world.
If we can die to self, if we can shift our focus, exchange our temporal perspectives for God's eternal one, then we won't mess around with worrying about who likes whom and why am I not being asked out? Forgiveness won't be such a chore. We won't stress over what so and so said to us at work or why our boss only manages to see our shortcomings and mistakes rather than praise our strengths and successes. We won't be so selfish with our time and insist on getting home in time for the game or our favorite TV show. Who cares? Does it really matter?
That same song I quoted above begins with this question: "Who is like unto the Lord our God who dwelleth on high, who dwelleth on high?" The answer is no one. The truth is that we seek to fulfill our lives with so many petty things and we dwell on the lack of fulfillment they bring. I suggest we move. Take up a new dwelling. Dwell. It's a weird word. It can mean where we live, like our house. It can mean to abide, hang out, stick around, just be. It can be figurative, like what we allow our mind to dwell upon. Philippians tells us to dwell upon things that are pure and lovely, etc. Paul says elsewhere that it's in Him that we "live and move and have our being." In other words, in Christ, we are to dwell. Christ Himself told His followers to abide (dwell) in Him. And so I ask, what are we doing with our time and where are we dwelling?
*Disclaimer: this is an extremely disjointed, stream of consciousness blog that may not make a bit of sense to anyone who reads it. Don't expect to follow this train of thought...I think it derailed.
I've been told it's time to blog again. I think there are only two people who still read my blog, but that's ok, this is more a time to get my thoughts out than to really say anything to anyone, so I'm blogging again.
I was driving home from Starbucks just now, mulling over the talk I'd just had with my good friend Arshunda and trying to decide what to blog about. In that talk, I had mentioned a Caedmon's Call song called "You Created." The chorus says, "You created nothing that gives me more pleasure than you. And you won't give me something that gives me more pleasure than you." That's so not how my thinking has gone lately. I've been caught up in seeking something, a relationship, a place to plug in at church, a new adventure, whatever, just something because I haven't really been content with God. I've honestly just plain failed to let Him be my source of joy. It's the same old, same old I've got to wrap my head around. We have a God-shaped vacuum that we're all trying to fill with world-shaped stuff and it doesn't work. It never has. It never will. Only when we realize and really buy into the truth that God designed us with that vacuum and God intends to fill it with Himself, do we find joy.
Arshunda and I also talked about going on the offensive to combat the lies of the enemy and fight for that joy and abundance we're promised in Scripture. It's human nature to hole up and defend yourself...to put up your fences, your fists, and protect, protect, protect. But, going on the offensive involves dying to self. It calls for reckless abandonment of security and exposing yourself to the potential for hurt or even death. Paul says we are to offer our bodies as living sacrifices. Jesus told us to die to ourselves. Those things happen on the battle field. They happen as we shift our perspective from inward, focusing on me and my needs to outward, seeing the needs of others. So many of us are seeking to know God's individual plan for our lives, when God wants us to see His big picture plan for the world.
If we can die to self, if we can shift our focus, exchange our temporal perspectives for God's eternal one, then we won't mess around with worrying about who likes whom and why am I not being asked out? Forgiveness won't be such a chore. We won't stress over what so and so said to us at work or why our boss only manages to see our shortcomings and mistakes rather than praise our strengths and successes. We won't be so selfish with our time and insist on getting home in time for the game or our favorite TV show. Who cares? Does it really matter?
That same song I quoted above begins with this question: "Who is like unto the Lord our God who dwelleth on high, who dwelleth on high?" The answer is no one. The truth is that we seek to fulfill our lives with so many petty things and we dwell on the lack of fulfillment they bring. I suggest we move. Take up a new dwelling. Dwell. It's a weird word. It can mean where we live, like our house. It can mean to abide, hang out, stick around, just be. It can be figurative, like what we allow our mind to dwell upon. Philippians tells us to dwell upon things that are pure and lovely, etc. Paul says elsewhere that it's in Him that we "live and move and have our being." In other words, in Christ, we are to dwell. Christ Himself told His followers to abide (dwell) in Him. And so I ask, what are we doing with our time and where are we dwelling?
Saturday, January 20, 2007
Random thoughts from today's walk...
I went walking today and it only took 3 miles for me to realize how very selfish I can be. While walking, a million thoughts went through my head.
I pondered the words to the songs playing on my mp3 player and I realized that I have been stagnating...spending way too much time sitting in my room, watching movies, playing on my computer, reading, whatever... I spend a lot of time alone. Now, there is a time for that, don't get me wrong. We need to be alone sometimes. We need to get away and let God speak to us, but not all of my alone time has been spent pondering the deep things of God. Sure, some of it has, but not even a significant percentage, I must admit. And so it hit me as I walked, that life's not about me. I've heard it a million times and said it a few myself, but I think I'm starting to get it. It helps that I pondered this thought a bit the other day and wrote about it in my prayer journal (for those who don't know, that's like a blog that only God reads, usually written in a book full of blank paper with a pen...remember those?).
Anyway, one of the other things that went through my head was how the deep things of God are so simple and the complexities of the world are so shallow. People usually think to be deep, you must be complex, but there is nothing complex in the parables Jesus told...they were simple stories of observable situations with a much deeper meanings. Faith is simple. Sure, there are complexities that we go through, but those are hindrances to faith, often times brought on by the sin that so easily entangles or the sin of others in which we find ourselves victims. Regardless, they are to be thrown off and faith is to remain in all it's simplicity...the childlike belief that God is in control and that He cares about you individually.
And this concludes "random thoughts from today's walk." Tune in next time to find out what goes through Karla's brain when she walks again.
I went walking today and it only took 3 miles for me to realize how very selfish I can be. While walking, a million thoughts went through my head.
I pondered the words to the songs playing on my mp3 player and I realized that I have been stagnating...spending way too much time sitting in my room, watching movies, playing on my computer, reading, whatever... I spend a lot of time alone. Now, there is a time for that, don't get me wrong. We need to be alone sometimes. We need to get away and let God speak to us, but not all of my alone time has been spent pondering the deep things of God. Sure, some of it has, but not even a significant percentage, I must admit. And so it hit me as I walked, that life's not about me. I've heard it a million times and said it a few myself, but I think I'm starting to get it. It helps that I pondered this thought a bit the other day and wrote about it in my prayer journal (for those who don't know, that's like a blog that only God reads, usually written in a book full of blank paper with a pen...remember those?).
Anyway, one of the other things that went through my head was how the deep things of God are so simple and the complexities of the world are so shallow. People usually think to be deep, you must be complex, but there is nothing complex in the parables Jesus told...they were simple stories of observable situations with a much deeper meanings. Faith is simple. Sure, there are complexities that we go through, but those are hindrances to faith, often times brought on by the sin that so easily entangles or the sin of others in which we find ourselves victims. Regardless, they are to be thrown off and faith is to remain in all it's simplicity...the childlike belief that God is in control and that He cares about you individually.
And this concludes "random thoughts from today's walk." Tune in next time to find out what goes through Karla's brain when she walks again.
Saturday, December 23, 2006
What's Wrong with Nirvana?
(not the singing group...we're not going there...)
The other night, I was having dinner with a teacher friend of mine at Freebirds (yum) and we we were talking about the Christian life and how difficult it can be at times. She mentioned Nirvana and how Buddhism has a pretty interesting way of looking at desire and how it should be handled. She made a point to say that Buddhism is not a religion, but a way of life. I hadn't thought of that before, but at the same time, if you think about it, Christianity is both a religion and a way of life. In fact, most religions are a way of life...or at least a set of guidelines by which to live life. I think Buddhism is also both a religion and a way of life.
But, that's actually an afterthought to the conversation we were having. While we were talking, my immediate thought with regard to Nirvana is that it falls short of dealing with the entire human experience. In essence, it throws the baby out with the bath water. I know it has to do with eliminating desires and it's goal is to reach a level of absence of feelings and escape the pain that comes from unfulfilled desires (Very reminiscent of the advice Yoda gave young Anakin with regard to his love for Padme).
However, not being a Buddhist, I don't really know that much about the idea of Nirvana, so I decided to read up a little more, so I could write from an informed perspective rather than an ignorant one. Here's what I discovered. There's a lot of gibberish surrounding definitions of the concept and a lot more terms that would have to be defined in order to even begin to understand what in the world they're talking about. Here's the opening paragraph from Wikipedia's article on Nirvana. It's the best synopsis I've found so far:
[Nirvana] is a mode of being that is free from mind-contaminants (Kilesa) such as lust, anger or craving. It is thus a state of great inner peace and contentment - the end of suffering, or Dukkha. The Buddha in the Dhammapada says of Nirvana that it is "the highest happiness." This is not the transitory, sense-based happiness of everyday life, but rather an enduring, transcendental happiness integral to the calmness attained through enlightenment.
Here are my thoughts. As I was saying earlier, Nirvana throws the baby out with the bathwater. What I mean is that in order to get rid of the natural desires of the flesh, one would also have to give up the joy involved in the fulfillment of those desires. I don't believe God made us to be stoics (another philosophy involving the abandonment of desire). He made us in His image, with feelings. He made us male and female and He designed us for relationships. Yes, sin came into the world and brought with it pain and suffering, but although it marred the image of God in man, it did not eliminate it. The goal of attaining enlightenment seems to me to be an utterly selfish one in which relationships, as well as desires, would have to be sacrificed. While we cannot seek to make ourselves happy solely through relationships with others, God did create us for a relationship with Him and it is only in restoring that relationship through the experience of salvation that we find the abundant life He intended for Adam and Eve.
Nirvana seeks to get rid of pain by getting rid of desire, but the problem with that is that pain is also part of the human experience and serves a very real and in the long run, welcome, purpose of making us stronger, more mature, and better able to relate to others. Also, pain and suffering help us to long for Heaven, the true place of fulfillment.
Here are some additional thoughts of my friend Brant on the subject:
Some of the concepts about nirvana and Buddhism are so abstract, they are kind of hard to grasp. I read that Buddha, as a young kid, was sheltered from different kinds of suffering...people of old age...sickness...etc. At 29 years of age, he sought to find the origin of suffering and how it could be overcome. I guess the goal of Buddhism is to obtain the state of nirvana. In doing this, it involves getting rid of the desires which in the end lead to suffering. I agree with you in that setting a goal of nirvana is a selfish one. It reminds of some new age thoughts that are centered around "feeling good." I am also reminded of a saying I heard one time, "The worship service is not about giving you goose bumps! When you leave a service, you should not be concerned with how YOU feel, but how does God feel. Was he lifted up?" (paraphrase)
For a Christian, we are told in scripture that there will be persecution..suffering. There is no way to escape it. For some, it may be emotional suffering, but for some, such as persecuted believers and martyrs, there is actual physical suffering. Even though suffering may not be pleasant, it definitely has its place in a Christian's life. It reminds us of our weakness, teaches us about God, builds perserverance and helps us understand Christ's sacrifice. I found this passage Matt. 5:4..it says, "Blessed are those who have been persecuted for the sake of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. " I look to our perfect example of how we should live...Jesus Christ...and how he suffered. It weird we can find enjoyment through suffereing for the cause, but its true.
What do you think?
(not the singing group...we're not going there...)
The other night, I was having dinner with a teacher friend of mine at Freebirds (yum) and we we were talking about the Christian life and how difficult it can be at times. She mentioned Nirvana and how Buddhism has a pretty interesting way of looking at desire and how it should be handled. She made a point to say that Buddhism is not a religion, but a way of life. I hadn't thought of that before, but at the same time, if you think about it, Christianity is both a religion and a way of life. In fact, most religions are a way of life...or at least a set of guidelines by which to live life. I think Buddhism is also both a religion and a way of life.
But, that's actually an afterthought to the conversation we were having. While we were talking, my immediate thought with regard to Nirvana is that it falls short of dealing with the entire human experience. In essence, it throws the baby out with the bath water. I know it has to do with eliminating desires and it's goal is to reach a level of absence of feelings and escape the pain that comes from unfulfilled desires (Very reminiscent of the advice Yoda gave young Anakin with regard to his love for Padme).
However, not being a Buddhist, I don't really know that much about the idea of Nirvana, so I decided to read up a little more, so I could write from an informed perspective rather than an ignorant one. Here's what I discovered. There's a lot of gibberish surrounding definitions of the concept and a lot more terms that would have to be defined in order to even begin to understand what in the world they're talking about. Here's the opening paragraph from Wikipedia's article on Nirvana. It's the best synopsis I've found so far:
[Nirvana] is a mode of being that is free from mind-contaminants (Kilesa) such as lust, anger or craving. It is thus a state of great inner peace and contentment - the end of suffering, or Dukkha. The Buddha in the Dhammapada says of Nirvana that it is "the highest happiness." This is not the transitory, sense-based happiness of everyday life, but rather an enduring, transcendental happiness integral to the calmness attained through enlightenment.
Here are my thoughts. As I was saying earlier, Nirvana throws the baby out with the bathwater. What I mean is that in order to get rid of the natural desires of the flesh, one would also have to give up the joy involved in the fulfillment of those desires. I don't believe God made us to be stoics (another philosophy involving the abandonment of desire). He made us in His image, with feelings. He made us male and female and He designed us for relationships. Yes, sin came into the world and brought with it pain and suffering, but although it marred the image of God in man, it did not eliminate it. The goal of attaining enlightenment seems to me to be an utterly selfish one in which relationships, as well as desires, would have to be sacrificed. While we cannot seek to make ourselves happy solely through relationships with others, God did create us for a relationship with Him and it is only in restoring that relationship through the experience of salvation that we find the abundant life He intended for Adam and Eve.
Nirvana seeks to get rid of pain by getting rid of desire, but the problem with that is that pain is also part of the human experience and serves a very real and in the long run, welcome, purpose of making us stronger, more mature, and better able to relate to others. Also, pain and suffering help us to long for Heaven, the true place of fulfillment.
Here are some additional thoughts of my friend Brant on the subject:
Some of the concepts about nirvana and Buddhism are so abstract, they are kind of hard to grasp. I read that Buddha, as a young kid, was sheltered from different kinds of suffering...people of old age...sickness...etc. At 29 years of age, he sought to find the origin of suffering and how it could be overcome. I guess the goal of Buddhism is to obtain the state of nirvana. In doing this, it involves getting rid of the desires which in the end lead to suffering. I agree with you in that setting a goal of nirvana is a selfish one. It reminds of some new age thoughts that are centered around "feeling good." I am also reminded of a saying I heard one time, "The worship service is not about giving you goose bumps! When you leave a service, you should not be concerned with how YOU feel, but how does God feel. Was he lifted up?" (paraphrase)
For a Christian, we are told in scripture that there will be persecution..suffering. There is no way to escape it. For some, it may be emotional suffering, but for some, such as persecuted believers and martyrs, there is actual physical suffering. Even though suffering may not be pleasant, it definitely has its place in a Christian's life. It reminds us of our weakness, teaches us about God, builds perserverance and helps us understand Christ's sacrifice. I found this passage Matt. 5:4..it says, "Blessed are those who have been persecuted for the sake of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. " I look to our perfect example of how we should live...Jesus Christ...and how he suffered. It weird we can find enjoyment through suffereing for the cause, but its true.
What do you think?
Sunday, December 10, 2006
Cry Out to Jesus
After dropping Granddaddy off at his church, I was headed back to the house to get ready to go to mine when I passed a house with an assortment of inflatable Christmas decorations...you know the six-foot Santa, the Christmas Merry-Go-Round and of course the giant Frosty. As I approached, I could tell Frosty was holding something in his hand, but I couldn't tell what it was until I got closer. It was a candy cane-outstretched like he was offering it to someone, only the air had seeped out and the candy cane was drooping, just like the real ones when they're broken in half, but still hanging on by the plastic wrapper. It hit me that sometimes we look like that to God. Holding out our broken lives saying "Here you go, God. It's broken, but it's all I've got."
When I was a child, there was a song by the Gaithers that I loved called "Give Them All." I can't remember all the words, but the chorus went something like this,
Give them all,
Give them all
Give them all to Jesus.
Shattered dreams
Wounded hearts
And broken toys.
Give them all
Give them all
Give them all to Jesus,
And He will turn
Your sorrows
Into joys.
I was too young to understand the shattered dreams and wounded hearts part, but I got the broken toys. Now that I'm older, the toys aren't so much what I mourn, but the disappointments in life make me feel like that inflatable Frosty holding out my droopy candy cane saying, "God, can you fix it, or better yet, can I have a new one?"
The problem of pain exists and it's not getting better this side of Heaven. We're all victims, 100%, of the pain, sorrow and frustration that plagues humanity and while we may be aware that the ultimate cause is sin, and that we live in a fallen world, it's hard to find comfort in that. The only way to find comfort is to bring our sorrows to the Cross.
We often think of the Cross as only a place to get our sins forgiven and have our way paid to Heaven, but the truth is that not only was our redemption purchased there, but all the effects of sin were washed away there. We can have peace in the midst of trouble if we take our anxieties to Christ. Even if the sorrow is our own doing and we have failed miserably, God can redeem our biggest failures and make something beautiful come of them.
So many books and songs have been written addressing this very situation of humanity. The Problem of Pain by C.S. Lewis; Where's God When it Hurts by Philip Yancey; When God Doesn't Make Sense by James Dobson...and the list goes on.
The CD in my car's stereo right now has a song by Third Day called "Cry out to Jesus." It says no matter your situation, whether you are sad because of a tragic death, stuck in a marriage that isn't working out, fighting an addiction that won't let go or just plain lonely, the answer is to cry out to Jesus.
So, if you're feeling like Frosty with your broken candy cane of a life and there seems to be no light at the end of your tunnel, I pray you'll cry out to Jesus and let Him turn your sorrows into joys.
"Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received" (2 Corinthians 1:3-4).
After dropping Granddaddy off at his church, I was headed back to the house to get ready to go to mine when I passed a house with an assortment of inflatable Christmas decorations...you know the six-foot Santa, the Christmas Merry-Go-Round and of course the giant Frosty. As I approached, I could tell Frosty was holding something in his hand, but I couldn't tell what it was until I got closer. It was a candy cane-outstretched like he was offering it to someone, only the air had seeped out and the candy cane was drooping, just like the real ones when they're broken in half, but still hanging on by the plastic wrapper. It hit me that sometimes we look like that to God. Holding out our broken lives saying "Here you go, God. It's broken, but it's all I've got."
When I was a child, there was a song by the Gaithers that I loved called "Give Them All." I can't remember all the words, but the chorus went something like this,
Give them all,
Give them all
Give them all to Jesus.
Shattered dreams
Wounded hearts
And broken toys.
Give them all
Give them all
Give them all to Jesus,
And He will turn
Your sorrows
Into joys.
I was too young to understand the shattered dreams and wounded hearts part, but I got the broken toys. Now that I'm older, the toys aren't so much what I mourn, but the disappointments in life make me feel like that inflatable Frosty holding out my droopy candy cane saying, "God, can you fix it, or better yet, can I have a new one?"
The problem of pain exists and it's not getting better this side of Heaven. We're all victims, 100%, of the pain, sorrow and frustration that plagues humanity and while we may be aware that the ultimate cause is sin, and that we live in a fallen world, it's hard to find comfort in that. The only way to find comfort is to bring our sorrows to the Cross.
We often think of the Cross as only a place to get our sins forgiven and have our way paid to Heaven, but the truth is that not only was our redemption purchased there, but all the effects of sin were washed away there. We can have peace in the midst of trouble if we take our anxieties to Christ. Even if the sorrow is our own doing and we have failed miserably, God can redeem our biggest failures and make something beautiful come of them.
So many books and songs have been written addressing this very situation of humanity. The Problem of Pain by C.S. Lewis; Where's God When it Hurts by Philip Yancey; When God Doesn't Make Sense by James Dobson...and the list goes on.
The CD in my car's stereo right now has a song by Third Day called "Cry out to Jesus." It says no matter your situation, whether you are sad because of a tragic death, stuck in a marriage that isn't working out, fighting an addiction that won't let go or just plain lonely, the answer is to cry out to Jesus.
So, if you're feeling like Frosty with your broken candy cane of a life and there seems to be no light at the end of your tunnel, I pray you'll cry out to Jesus and let Him turn your sorrows into joys.
"Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received" (2 Corinthians 1:3-4).
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